Hi, I'm Dave Rhodes, and I'm in jail.
     Just six months ago, I was in dire financial straits.  My car and
  house had been repossessed, my phone was disconnected, my family had
  left me, I had creditors hounding me daily, and I was on the verge of
  bankruptcy.
     Then, I hit upon one of the most amazing schemes for making quick
  money that I had ever thought of.  I would start a pyramid scheme and
  make it sound legal with some details about creating and maintaining
  mailing lists.  It wasn't necessary to dream up anything too
  plausible, just enough to fool a significant portion of the
  population.  I made up a reasonable sounding flyer and used a
  friend's computer to post it to one of the computer bulletin boards.
  I took out five post office boxes in different cities and made up
  four other names so that the first five contributions all went to me.
     To say the least, the response was overwhelming.  I was a
  millionaire overnight.  You see, the way these things work, if
  everyone sends the letter to twenty other people, and those twenty
  each send the letter to twenty more, it doesn't take more than a few
  iterations before the recipient list includes everyone on the planet.
  Only the first ten or fifteen people ever see any money, and I was
  all of the first five!
     The number of greedy people who use computers and don't
  understand basic math exceeded my expectations by several orders of
  magnitude. My original note was posted on many computer bulletin
  boards, including something called the internet, and response was
  overwhelming.  Some of them didn't even have the sense to put their
  own name on the list!
    As the money poured in, I thought my problems were solved for life.
  As it turns out, they were only beginning.  I found out that the same
  geometric progression that made me rich had one major drawback.
  Since literally millions of people would see my message, the chances
  of someone reporting it to the police was a virtual certainty.  As
  word got around via the same computer bulletin boards that carried my
  original message, more and more people complained to the authorities.
     Soon, I was arrested and charged with fraud.  My money was
  confiscated under the federal racketeering laws, so I could not even
  afford an attorney.  Many of the first people to take advantage of my
  scheme were also arrested.
     Still, my original message continued to propagate throughout
  computer bulletin boards everywhere.  A substantial number of copies
  got sent through regular mail, which caused more and more federal
  charges to be applied to me and those early participants.  In my own
  way, I have become quite a celebrity.
     These days, I no longer have creditors bothering me, I don't have
  to worry about housing or basic necessities, I'm entertained, and I
  have a good friend Bruno who takes care of me.  I have everything I
  really need, and although Bruno hurts me sometimes, I'm mostly
  satisfied with my life.
     During her last visit, my court appointed attorney said that
  practically every day someone new was arrested for trying to
  participate in my scheme, even long after my own arrest was
  publicized.  In this way, my original opinion, that there are enough
  morons in the world to make yourself fabulously rich, is confirmed
  again and again.
     So, with this in mind, Bruno and I have started a small enterprise
  here in prison that you should know about.  It requires only a minor
  expenditure on your part and can make you wealthy beyond your wildest
  dreams.
     Please follow these instructions exac@#~s8
  -`15ht@#&fge

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